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Latest Entries

Nightmare's Moat

Saturday, 7 November 2009 7:58 P GMT+01

The Pillowghost Stories So Far

Saturday, 7 November 2009 6:19 P GMT+01

Is the Internet something one should resist or embrace?

Saturday, 7 November 2009 1:52 P GMT+01

'Cern Zoo' retrocaused itself?

Thursday, 5 November 2009 7:39 P GMT+01

ANONthology - authors revealed

Tuesday, 3 November 2009 9:07 P GMT+01

Cern Zoo Nicked

Tuesday, 3 November 2009 11:49 A GMT+01

A review of 'Cern Zoo' by Nick Jackson

Monday, 2 November 2009 7:00 P GMT+01

Pillowgeist

Monday, 2 November 2009 2:27 P GMT+01

"Occidental and surely accidental"

Saturday, 31 October 2009 1:28 P GMT+01

Pillowghost

Thursday, 29 October 2009 8:19 P GMT+01

Karim Ghahwagi's Real-Time Review of NEMONYMOUS TWO

Thursday, 29 October 2009 11:53 A GMT+01

The Last Balcony

Tuesday, 27 October 2009 8:58 P GMT+01

All Gods Angels, Beware! - Quentin S Crisp (Part 2)

Sunday, 25 October 2009 11:56 A GMT+01

All God's Angels, Beware! - Quentin S Crisp

Friday, 23 October 2009 4:50 P GMT+01

DFL's Last Bow

Friday, 23 October 2009 11:24 A GMT+01

Black Static - issue 13

Wednesday, 21 October 2009 8:36 P GMT+01

The Ozymandias Site

Tuesday, 20 October 2009 10:10 A GMT+01

CERN Zoo - A DFL Real-Time Review (Part 3)

Monday, 19 October 2009 3:04 P GMT+01

Shoals

Monday, 19 October 2009 10:23 A GMT+01

CERN Zoo - a DFL real-time review

Saturday, 17 October 2009 6:26 P GMT+01

Early template for blogging

Friday, 16 October 2009 6:47 P GMT+01

Women with their backs to us

Wednesday, 14 October 2009 10:33 A GMT+01

Pirate (two)

Monday, 12 October 2009 12:51 P GMT+01

Nostalgia

Saturday, 10 October 2009 10:06 P GMT+01

Text Not Textpectation - Part 2

Friday, 9 October 2009 8:33 P GMT+01

Text not Textpectation

Thursday, 8 October 2009 5:09 P GMT+01

alogos on 'The Hawler' reading

Tuesday, 6 October 2009 11:10 P GMT+01

The Apocryfan (read aloud)

Tuesday, 6 October 2009 7:09 P GMT+01

Yesterfang (read aloud)

Monday, 5 October 2009 7:08 P GMT+01

Different Skins - by Gary McMahon

Sunday, 4 October 2009 2:29 P GMT+01

Ego Massage

posted Wednesday, 24 October 2007

 

Last Modified: Saturday, Mar 31/2007 11:36  

Written by df lewis   

“Come on, how about having some integrity just for once?
Moral cowardice is even worse than egotism.
Des, you are one of the biggest egotists around, at least as big an egotist as I am!
Just admit it and have done with it, for fuck's sake!

I'm only saying out loud what everyone says in private.
That's my real fault, I guess.”

That’s what was written on the poetry (!) thread yesterday here:

http://www.ttapress.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=89&postdays=0&postorder=asc&start=75

Said by Rhys Hughes to me.

I have known Rhys for many years but I haven’t seen him face to face since 1998.

The above was said after what I thought was a typical internet altercation but then inflamed into such statements concerning ‘ego massage’.

But it leads me to ask various *rhetorical* questions:

Now, it’s probably ego massage for me to respond at all.

How can I escape that?

How much was it my fault that the exchange arrived at this sorry pass?

If Rhys and I had this discussion in a pub, would we have come to such ‘blows’?

How many friendships has the Internet destroyed?

How many careers?

Regarding the main accusation, I think to myself: I have spent about 8 years in proffering sensible and crazy literary theories and other opinions in wildly different electronic venues. This has been because of my love of brainstorming, I claim. This has also been part of my patchwork ‘career’ as a writer and publisher. If I were truly ambitious, all this could have been accomplished far more coherently since 1986 when I embarked upon it. If I treasured my ego, why would I not at least have massaged it properly?

Where does acceptable promotion end and ego massage begin?

And do people talk about me behind my back, as claimed? I suspect not.

How can I instil humour into this blog-post, as Rhys surely would if he’s in a good mood?

I have not submitted to a publisher since 2000. I have put all my previous published material freely available on the Internet. I don’t think I massage my ego, at all, but my nemo.

"The nemo is an evolutionary force, as necessary as the ego. The ego is certainty, what I am; the nemo is potentiality, what I am not. But instead of utilizing the nemo as we would utilize any other force, we allow ourselves to be terrified by it, as primitive man was terrified by lightning. We run screaming from this mysterious shape in the middle of our town, even though the real terror is not in itself, but in our terror at it."
-- John Fowles 1964 (from 'The Necessity of Nemo' in 'The Aristos')

Now John Fowles was a proper guru!

Well, I wonder how many people have heard of DF Lewis or Rhys Hughes? We’re both going to be in ‘Big Brother’ soon. Separately!

======================

 

  

LIST OF COMMENTS

1/3. faux-gentleness
Written by des - Saturday, March 31 2007

Another rhetorical question just occurred to me:

Where does politeness end and faux-gentleness begin?

Whatever the case, I give Rhys 10 out of 10 for yesterday!  If you've read the poetry thread, perhaps, after all ,that was what he was trying to attain, after only getting 4 out of 10 the day before.  ;-)


2/3. integrity
Written by des - Saturday, March 31 2007

The things that really hurt most was the 'just for once' at the end here:

“Come on, how about having some integrity just for once?
 ===========

24 Oct 07 addition:

This is me getting my ego massaged:





1. Weirdmonger left...
Wednesday, 24 October 2007 4:32 pm

I have been following Rhys' writing career lately and am pleased he is doing so well, especially in Spain and Portugal. He also has a novel coming out with PS Publishing soon. Here is an earlier blog of mine about Rhys: http://weirdmonger.blogspot.com/2006/05/rhys-hughes.html des


2. Weirdmonger left...
Tuesday, 30 October 2007 2:19 pm

Latest news on his successes from Rhys: http://ookami.co.uk/forumpage/viewtopic.php?p=16779#16779